re: Poking

I just wanted everyone to know that Collin poked me on Facebook this week.


He has a strict no-poke policy, and prefers to let the pokes just sit there rather than follow basic Facebook etiquette and poke them back in a never-ending stream of cyber-physical-contact or remove them. Well, the other day he logged onto his account at my house and forgot to sign out. I resisted the tempation to post obnoxious comments on all his friend's walls, but did decide to poke myself, just so that someone in the world would have been able to say that Collin poked them. I don't know if it counts that I poked myself on Collin's behalf, but as far as the internet is concerned, it is Collin that poked me. And I am sticking to that.

I guess I can't really talk about not responding to Facebook advances, since I usually let my event and application invitations just sit there so that if i ever feel unpopular I can always look online and realize that I have over 100 invitations to things.



I hope this doesn't make you stop inviting me to things, Facebook friends. One of these days I might join your zombie armies. You never know.

re: Passive Aggressive Piggies

I've been a reader of PassiveAgressiveNotes.com for awhile, and though I have come across my share of passive-agressive notes in the hallway of my apartment building and in the break area at work, none of the notes were much more creative than the overused "your mother doesn't work here" or "there is no such thing as the coffee fairy" type.

A few weeks ago at work, however, someone must have thought that those notes weren't doing the trick and decided that a visual would be more effective. We walked in to the break room one morning to find these subtley sitting in the middle of the table:



Is a picture really worth a thousand words? Perhaps. But I just had to wipe the counter clean of a massive coffee spill left untended before I made my oatmeal (as the piggies calmly looked on), so I'm not sure they are getting the point across.

(I thought it was so funny that I sent the picture in - Passive Agressive Notes posted my submission last week.)

re: Indiana jones and that crystal skull thing

dear indiana jones,

I was so excited to see you back in action on the big screen, fighting those dirty commies, that i went to last night's midnight screening. I got all giddy when I thought I saw you buying some popcorn before the show, but it turns it out was just some other dude with a whip. Easy mistake.

I came as a truly devoted fan, ready to say to you the thing that i don't say to just anyone ...

I have to say, though, that those were two of the most ridiculous hours of big screen time that i have ever seen (almost as ridiculous as that earring that you usually wear in real life. i sure am glad that they made you take that out for filming), interspersed with some true moments of awesome. Marion! The ants! The double-crossing! The sexy communists!

Unfortunately, I went right home and washed that other message off to make room for something new to stick on my eyelids today during work since I am way too tired to be here.


p.s. -
Shia. You are doing a lot to help sexy up the pervy mustache look. Thank you.

re: No Shame

Confession: I just bought a box of opened tampons at the thrift store. I don't think it is a big deal ... the box was opened, but all the tampons are individually wrapped, you know? It was an almost full box of 40, and totally my brand, for just $.69, so I really couldn't pass it up. There was really nothing wrong with them, so I like to think that some dude probably donated them after his girlfriend moved out and he found them under the sink or something.

But you know how some people get a little embarrassed just at the idea of buying tampons in the first place, even in a nice clean supermarket? Now think about buying an opened box of them in a thrift store. I guess I really do have no shame.

re: Bay to Breakers

Look who came to visit last week - Hoon!

She happened to come on the best weekend ever - Bay to Breakers. I've talked about this party/race before, and this year was no disappointment. everyone was still really drunk by 10am, but this year they were at least classy drunk.

There were, like, a billion Flight of the Conchords there, poisoning people with their gasses.

Best costume this year goes to the giant Daft Punk float. They even had a smoke machine in there.

And the best thing about Bay to Breakers is that if you forgot to wear a costume, taking off everything is a totally acceptable costume substitute. Right Michelle?

re: an educational vacation

For some reason I always associate educational and well-planned vacations with my family, and expect less of the trips with my friends. That is why it is just kind of cool that some fun people and I rented a 10 passenger van yesterday to take an educational drive to the redwoods. Several people, spying the enormity of our van, stopped to even ask us if this was some sort of field trip for a school group. We looked THAT scholarly! (or that "special")

We drove up to the Avenue of the Giants. The trees were so tall! Shawn and Adam couldn't even touch the tops, and they were by far the tallest people there.

One of the best educational parts of the day was found in the visitor center. I learned that you should never just stick your hand into a mystery box labeled "touch and feel"...

...because someone might think it is a funny trick to make you touch a nasty old cougar leg without knowing it.

I also learned that the better looking you are, the easier it is to hold up an enormous felled tree with your bare hands.

We spent a surprising portion of the day just throwing stuff. This is the one thing that was nice about not having parents around. No one was there to tell us to quit running through the forest throwing rocks and sticks at eachother.


And big rocks into water.


It got so primal at one point that we were looking for a conch shell to settle things between us and finally had to just get back into the van and fall asleep or we would have killed eachother. Which would have been educational in its own way, I'm sure.